Question of Faith

Is TikTok Responsible for Someone's Death?

Fr. Damian Ference and Deacon Mike Hayes Season 2 Episode 36

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Who is truly responsible when tragedy strikes due to online content? Join Deacon Mike Hayes and Father Damian Ference as they tackle the heartbreaking case of a 10-year-old girl who lost her life after attempting a dangerous "blackout challenge" she saw on TikTok.

We dissect the moral and ethical implications for content creators and platforms alike, drawing parallels to the provocations of MTV's "Jackass." Leaning on the teachings of the Catechism of the Catholic Church, we scrutinize how ignorance, duress, and fear influence moral culpability. This episode navigates the treacherous waters between freedom of speech and the urgent need for ethical guidelines in today's digital landscape.

On a lighter yet equally important note, we explore the transformative power of saying "no" and prioritizing what truly matters in life. Personal stories illuminate the importance of morning prayers, exercise, and building genuine friendships, while highlighting how teaching offers intellectual and creative satisfaction. Discover practical strategies for setting boundaries and organizing your life to protect personal time and well-being.

Church Search:  Shrine of Queen of the Rosary in Parma Heights
Readings for the 26th Sunday can be found here.

Speaker 1:

On today's Question of Faith is TikTok responsible for someone's death? Hey everybody, this is Question of Faith. I am Deacon Mike Hayes. I am the Director of Young Adult Ministry here in the Diocese of Cleveland.

Speaker 2:

And I'm Father Damien Ferencz, the Vicar for Evangelization.

Speaker 1:

So crazy story we came across. So, basically, a 10-year-old girl was viewing videos on TikTok. So, basically, a 10-year-old girl was viewing videos on TikTok and they had the so-called blackout challenge, which encourages users to record themselves as they engage in self-asphyxiation Right, right, and sometimes a point of unconsciousness. So this girl tried this and she died. And so the question becomes okay, well, wait a minute, TikTok put that idea in her head, or I shouldn't say TikTok in particular, but the users of TikTok who are using this platform to record these videos put this idea in their head. So is there some responsibility on the end of the creators of these videos and, as well as the platform itself, who provides a platform for these videos to be viewed? Is there some responsibility on their end for this person's death? What do you think? Maybe both, and yeah, I would say same. You know certainly the person. They didn't actually take the person's life.

Speaker 1:

Let's say they didn't say hey, you want to try this self-asphyxiation Come here, you know they didn't do that, but you know there's some responsibility here where they said well, should we be publishing this?

Speaker 2:

Or do you publish it with a disclaimer? Remember the show that used to be on MTV about 20 years ago Jackass?

Speaker 1:

Yeah.

Speaker 2:

Johnny Knoxville and all those guys would do those stunts and they would always run that beer near near and they would show uh, a skull and crossbones. Yeah, these are professional actors. Don't try this, don't do this. Yet you're showing it and people are imitable, right and um, mimesis is a real thing, so people will imitate, even if you're told not to imitate. I mean, this is how fashion works. It's how a lot of things work.

Speaker 1:

Yeah, that's true. Yeah, we see this and say, hey, I'd like to try that Right.

Speaker 2:

But then you get into and this is the whole debate with Elon Musk and X, as opposed to the former Twitter of freedom of speech and what can you say and what needs to be protected, and are there certain things that we shouldn't watch and who's culpable and how all those things work.

Speaker 1:

It's sort of you know when you think about it. The Internet was supposed to democratize, basically communication, that people could share information. They could do it quickly, they could do it easily. But then what kind of information are we putting out there? Are these?

Speaker 2:

things true, are they?

Speaker 1:

not true? Are they dangerous? Are they not true? Are they dangerous? Are they not dangerous? You've got all those kinds of things going on.

Speaker 2:

Yeah. So when you first asked the question, you texted it to me in a text message before I read your email and saw the context of the TikTok situation. So you asked about culpability. So what is culpability? It would mean one's responsibility for committing a certain action. And if you do a certain action, are you always culpable for it. So I was reading the Catechism this morning, Article 3 on man's freedom. This is section 1730. It begins with that and 1735,. Imputability and responsibility for an action can be diminished or even nullified by a few things. And here they are Ignorance.

Speaker 1:

Ignorance, so I don't know if this is grave matter.

Speaker 2:

Yeah, I didn't know this was a sin. I didn't know this was immoral Inadvertence. I didn't do it on purpose. I inadvertently did this thing, but I wasn't intending. It Got it Duress.

Speaker 1:

So someone's got you under stress.

Speaker 2:

They got a gun to your head or they're saying they're going to do this particular thing Interesting too. Oftentimes people would say I would suffer. You know you could do anything and I would never break. But if someone started to harm my family then I might break. You know there's duress, fear. If I don't do this, then I'm going to be in trouble, and sometimes this is how blackmail works too.

Speaker 2:

Oh sure, yeah, right so are you culpable for doing something if someone's blackmailing you to do it? Well, you're not completely free if you're acting out of fear. Right, coercion, habit. You've been doing this for a while, you don't want to do it and you still fall into it. It would be like incontinence, weakness of will, akrasia, addiction, uh-huh, yeah, correct.

Speaker 1:

It's the first step in the 12 steps. I am powerless over what it is that I'm addicted to, so therefore, I have to submit myself to God and say no-transcript.

Speaker 2:

Inordinate attachments. It doesn't qualify that here, but what it would be? An inordinate attachment? Well, this is, speaking in Thomistic language, that we are properly ordered, at our best, to God, but in our fallen nature there can be other things that we're attached to that don't bring us fulfillment. And again, if we're in the habit of going to those things, that could lessen our culpability too and other psychological or social factors, so culpability can be lessened because of those particular things. And it's good to do this honestly and not simply use that as an excuse for one's just lack of effort or moral courage or something. But I'm glad this section is in the catechism because I think, especially for people who may struggle with scrupulosity or have so much attention focused on their own weakness and not enough on God's goodness and mercy, this can be very helpful in terms of culpability.

Speaker 1:

And vice versa. Yeah, people who want to make an excuse for every single little thing. Well, no, how about you go through this checklist first and see? If any of these qualify.

Speaker 2:

Right If they don't.

Speaker 1:

Well then, you did this.

Speaker 2:

Yeah, yeah, and to take responsibility and ownership. Either way, there's always some acknowledgement that you know I did choose to act in some way on this. Maybe it wasn't the full consent of the will, but certainly something was here. So I'm guessing that whoever posted the video on TikTok was not intending to take the life of a 10-year-old child?

Speaker 1:

Probably not, or anybody else with that.

Speaker 2:

Right, but probably is now thinking, geez, I have responsibility there that I didn't realize I had. So it's really really important to think before you post, and sometimes, yeah, you just you get weak and people do stuff and then they regret it especially teenagers, you know, or the sexting stuff or thinking, oh, I can just post this online or say this thing and it won't matter. And then I realized I wish I could take that back. I didn't mean to do that, you know.

Speaker 1:

Yeah, how many emails have I written or posts I've made that I said oh, why did I do that? You know, why did I hit send so soon?

Speaker 2:

You know, especially if it was angry, right yeah.

Speaker 1:

Or, more importantly, like in like a Twitter fight or a Facebook post fight, where someone says something and you respond right away. A lot of times I'll type out my response now, maybe even in a Word doc, even before I even put it on, because it's so tempting just to hit enter, and so I'll post it on a Word doc and I'll say do I need to write this? Am I supposed to instruct this person on how dumb they sound right now? Yeah, or something along those lines. And I'll be like and wait a minute.

Speaker 1:

Is this just my opinion, or is this a fact?

Speaker 2:

Right.

Speaker 1:

Does this person have his facts wrong or is this my opinion? Trying to coerce someone else? And then you know. If it doesn't meet all those things, I'll say, okay, I don't need to post this right now, but it felt good writing it.

Speaker 2:

Yeah, sometimes you just need to get it out and write it out, and I find that too. I mean, I'm a big letter writer, you are, and I have gotten to the point where sometimes I write a letter and don't send it, and that happened maybe five or six weeks ago, wow, and I was glad that I didn't send it. But I was glad that I wrote it because I got it out. But sometimes I still do that. I probably shouldn't have sent it. Well, maybe I could have, but there's much more of a delay in writing a handwritten letter than there is to a text message or a tweet or a post. And the other thing that's interesting is I've talked to enough pastors that sometimes they'll get irate emails from parishioners in the evening and maybe on a Friday or Saturday evening that I'm like Father, what do you think was going on in the mind of that man? Do you think he might have been drinking a little Well?

Speaker 1:

maybe I'm like yeah, do you think? Yeah, you might even drink it a little.

Speaker 2:

Drunk driving is not something you want to do. Drunk emailing is also, or drunk texting.

Speaker 1:

Drunk texting.

Speaker 2:

But here's the thing, and this is interesting that the sin there, you'd be more culpable for your drinking than you would for the texting. Because what drinking?

Speaker 1:

does you lose your reason? You lose your hair.

Speaker 2:

Would for the texting, because what drinking does you lose your reason? It's like, sometimes too, people wind up doing, you know, promiscuous activities that they wouldn't do if they weren't drunk. That's right, and so the bigger issue there would be the drinking, because that's where you lost your reason and you got your guard down and then you did the other stuff because of the first sin, which was the excessive drinking.

Speaker 1:

I had to tell a student this one time when I was in campus ministry. A student got himself into that very situation right and then got written up for something you know and got in a whole lot of trouble. And I just sat him down and said look. I said here's what I notice. I said you got in trouble when you were drinking and you did this. Then you got in trouble when you were drinking and you did this. Then you got in trouble when you were drinking and you did that. Then the entire fraternity got in trouble for drinking. Then you got into this really big now mess of hot water and your excuses that you were drinking. You think maybe you should stop drinking.

Speaker 2:

What's the common denominator?

Speaker 1:

Look, I said I just want to point out every time you drink you get in trouble. I don't think you want to do time, so how about you just quit or at least slow down? And he was like yeah, okay, you're probably right.

Speaker 2:

And he did.

Speaker 1:

And he quit cold turkey. It's possible, yeah he did it really well.

Speaker 2:

I was really proud of him and you could probably ask have you gotten in trouble when you haven't been drinking? You probably say no. Okay, I think I did ask him that I think you're right. Yeah.

Speaker 1:

It's interesting. I mean, I noticed that myself. Right, it's like, okay, I had a couple of beers and I said something I shouldn't have said.

Speaker 2:

Okay, maybe I should only have one next time, yeah, or two, like. There's things in my life that if I don't do and I've mentioned this on a recent podcast then I'm in trouble. My prayer in the morning exercise time for a real friendship. One of the things I'm trying to figure out now is, because of the propa dudic year, I'm not teaching.

Speaker 2:

Oh right, and I did not realize how much life teaching gave me every week and the intellectual stimulation, working in the classroom and as a celibate, doing creative things, generative things, giving myself away in love, and so I've got to figure out more opportunities for that this year until I go back to teaching next year. So I'm working on my third book, getting that ready to go. But, but I need. I need more communal creative activities because, at the end of the day, I'm more of a creative than an administrator and you got to do things to give you life. Yeah, that's the truth yeah, and if I, don't, then that's on that, that's on.

Speaker 2:

I'm culpable for not finding, especially if I know now, yeah, that I need this in my life, and knowing that and then not not putting those things in my life, that's on. That's on. Putting those things in my life, that's on me. But if you didn't know that, then it wouldn't be on you as much. And there's the culpability thing. I didn't realize this. But now that I know this, I have to act differently as I move forward.

Speaker 1:

With school starting with me, I feel very overwhelmed the last couple of weeks with all the things I have to do. I'm like, oh my God, I didn't realize how much reading there was going to be. And I said now we have to do this outline every week. And you know it goes on and on. Plus, you know I have a job I work here with you and you know, a new office as well to run, you know. So I'm like, okay, things are starting to stack. I talked to my trainer that day. I said I need your help. I said I need your help to help me organize these things a little bit better. How can I get this exercise in?

Speaker 1:

I need to talk to you about my life I need to talk to you about all the things I need to get done, and I need you to help me figure out where I can fit this in in a more reasonable way. So I'm not exercising at 1130 at night.

Speaker 2:

Right, yeah, cause you can't sleep Right, then you can't sleep Right and I'm up and cranky yeah.

Speaker 1:

Which no one wants. That yeah, hangry, I get hangry.

Speaker 2:

I was going to say something. What was I going to say? It was right off that. But then you said cranky and I thought hangry, oh, days off, yeah.

Speaker 1:

Yeah, yeah.

Speaker 2:

So my day off is supposed to be Friday, but sometimes we have presbyteral council on Friday and sometimes there's a wedding, sometimes there's other things. I keep my own calendar. Mary Fugate, my executive assistant, she knows it, she has it, I share it with her, but I fill it up. So if I don't take my day off, guess whose fault that is you. It's not Mary's, it's mine, because I said yes to things that I should have said no to to protect my own time. And then I come back and then I have a whole full weekend with three masses and then get right back into meetings and I'm cranky on Monday. And who's responsible for that? I have the culpability because I know now if I don't protect the day off, then it's not good for me. So, yeah, that that first. That first attribute there ignorance. If you're okay, you lose culpability, but if you know and you still don't do it, that's on you.

Speaker 1:

Yes, your yes means nothing if you never say no. It was a lesson someone taught me a very long time ago and I was not appreciative of that lesson when they said it to me. I don't know who they think he is telling me I never say no. And I was like, well, you know he's right me I'd ever say no. And I was like, well, you know he's right, you know, if I don't say no once in a while, then people are just going to take advantage of me. Number one they think I'm always available to do whatever they need me to do whenever they want me to do it.

Speaker 2:

Yeah, I told my spiritual director recently that I think I say yes a lot because of my devotion to Our Lady, and then my penance for confession was to talk to Mary about how to say no and when to say no.

Speaker 1:

So I'm like all right, that's cool, that's very nice. We should look that up in the scripture. Did Mary ever say no? Did Mary ever decline anything?

Speaker 2:

Probably not.

Speaker 1:

Probably not that we would know of. But I did talk to her about it. That's good. What'd she?

Speaker 2:

say, well, that I need to be the best priest I can be so that to overwhelm myself with activity is not good.

Speaker 1:

Yeah, that's right.

Speaker 2:

So you could say no to certain things out of love. In all things, discernment In order to give yourself away in love. Well, right.

Speaker 1:

Yeah, exactly, I've been saying no a lot more lately, so it's been good for me.

Speaker 2:

That's what I practice. No, just practice.

Speaker 1:

No.

Speaker 2:

Can you?

Speaker 1:

No, that's what I practice. No, can you. No, no, nope. As you know, I'm a devoted follower of the West Wing series, and the woman who is at the door of the president, who's this executive secretary? She is training the next person. Who's going to deal with the next person? She said the answer to most questions that you are going to say more often than any other answer will be no. You decide who goes in and who goes out. The first lady is going to come in a lot. The president's going to ask you to take her privileges away. Don't do it, she said. Say no, the first lady needs to have access to you. She said you have to speak truth to power here. It's interesting.

Speaker 2:

I will say, though, my home pastor, father Carlin, said that when someone comes in to visit you and have a pastoral visit, do everything you can not to say no at the end of the day, especially if they want to be a God parent, but they're not qualified at this point yet need to do some things. So a good response is I want to help you. Here's what you need to do so that I can say yes. So that's a different way. But certain things, yeah, protect yourself. We could do a whole other podcast saying yes and no.

Speaker 1:

We shall All right time for a church. We've only done Lord's Shrine before. We haven't done any other shrines. Are there other shrines in the diocese that we should talk about?

Speaker 2:

Well, I went to Incarnate Word Academy in Parma Heights for grade school, kindergarten through eighth grade, and there is a beautiful, always open chapel or chapel shrine there to Our Lady of the Rosary. So it's right off Pearl Road in Parma Heights, just down the street, just south of St John Bosco, just near where we play softball, yeah.

Speaker 2:

Yeah, and you can stop in there, light a candle, pray. It's quiet often. You won't be the only person in there, because there's a lot of people who do their praying in there. So it's a nice little chapel or shrine to visit. Again. It's open 24-7 in Parma Heights, ohio, nice.

Speaker 1:

Check it out.

Speaker 2:

All right.

Speaker 1:

so 26 Sunday in Ordinary Time, second reading this week. I like Listen to this. Come now. You rich weep and wail over your impending miseries. Your wealth has rotted away. Your clothes have become moth-eating, your gold and silver have corroded, and that corrosion will be like a testimony against you. It will devour your flesh like a fire. That's what things that distract you from where you should be. That's what they'll do to you. They'll eat you alive, literally.

Speaker 2:

And that sets you up for the gospel. If your hand caused you to sin, cut it off your foot, cut it off your eye, pluck it out. I think this is important because it's easy to say no, I'm okay, I'm doing all right. No, think of your life, and are there things in your life that, if you remove these things from your life, you would be a holier man or woman, a better Christian, a better son, better daughter, better husband, better wife, uncle, priest, nun, whatever you are? If something changed here and if that's the case and you could say, yes, this is true, then get rid of it, because it'll bring you great freedom. And yeah, it's hard to let go of things, especially things that have grown to the center of our hearts, but if they're not godly, then they're not helping and it's time to let them go.

Speaker 1:

Back when blogging was a thing, my good friend, father Mark Massa, had the blog you Duped Me, lord, which was very good and he really enjoyed doing it. And then then at some point his spiritual director asked him to give it up, said you can go back to it, but I think maybe you should give it up for like two months and see what happens. And he gave up for two months and I I called him on the phone and said yes, I'm not really reading you. And I said so I feel like I'm kind of out of touch now how you doing. And he said no, I'm doing great. You know things are going on. He's telling me all the different things he's doing. I said so do you miss blogging? He goes, not at all. I was like, really, and he goes, yeah. And I said so you're not going to go back to it. He goes. I don't think I will.

Speaker 2:

He's a great spiritual director.

Speaker 1:

Yeah.

Speaker 2:

What else is going on around? We still. Everything that Rises Must Converge is coming to Tri-C October 4th and 5th. A live production of Flannery O'Connor's famous short story. Come out to that.

Speaker 1:

It's a great short story.

Speaker 2:

It really is, yeah, it covers.

Speaker 1:

so much I really enjoyed reading it. Thanks for pointing me in that direction. You're welcome. All right, so check us out in the show notes and we'll see you all again next time here. On Question of the day.

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